History Forum / General / British History / January 2004

Recovered from Deja News.com

Subject: [FAQ] The Unofficial D. Spencer Hines FAQ [LONG] [WHIMSICAL]
Date: 11/01/1999
Author: D. Charles Brewer <dsh_faq@westmore.demon.co.uk>

The soc.history.medieval Unofficial D. Spencer Hines FAQ
    ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
 written by "D. Charles Brewer", May 1999, updated sporadically
May-November 1999, contact via: dsh_faq@westmore.demon.co.uk
 
    "The 'Unofficial D. Spencer Hines FAQ' cobbled together by Brewer...
is riddled with lies, prevarications,  misrepresentations, omissions, simple
and compound errors and outright blunders."   - D. Spencer Hines
 
    "You obviously are making the assumptions that newcomers are 'too
stupid' to reach any independant conclusion."
 - Dr. Judy Weller
 
"D. Spencer Hines" is abbreviated to DSH throughout.
 
Contents
^^^^^^^^
Part 1: About the DSH FAQ
  1.1  Acknowledgements
  1.2  Why is there a DSH FAQ?
  1.3  Contributing to the DSH FAQ
  1.4  Questions awaiting answers
  1.5  Copyright information
 
Part 2: Frequently Asked Questions
  2.1  Who is DSH?
  2.2  What are DSH's credentials in medieval history?
  2.3  Why does DSH post to soc.history.medieval?
  2.4  How should I respond to posts made by DSH?
  2.5  What characterises the posts of DSH?
  2.6  To whom should I complain about DSH?
  2.7  Why was DSH barred from the GEN-ROYAL mailing list?
  2.8  Why was DSH barred from the MEDIEV-L mailing list?
  2.9  What was the Historiography Challenge?
 
Part 3: Frequently Flogged Horses
  Paul Gans (and other soc.history.medieval regulars)
  King Harold and the arrow in "his" eye
  Feudalism
  Techniques of education
  Baboons
  Horse harnesses
  The Society for Creative Anachronism.
  Real Medieval/Military Historians
  Pedantry
  Censorship
  soc.history.early-modern
  Medieval espionage
  President Clinton
  Genealogy
  Jus Primus Nochte
  Fluency of English kings in the English language
  Microsoft
 
Part 4: Killfiles
  Outlook Express
  knews
  rn, trn
 
Part 5: Using Dejanews
 
Part 6: Glossary
  6.1  Some commonly used terms
  6.2  Terms coined by and about DSH
 
Appendix: "Sweetie-Pie" versus Substance, by D. Spencer Hines
 
 
Part 1: About the DSH FAQ
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
1.1 Acknowledgements:
 
The author gratefully acknowledges the assistance of Laura Blanchard, who
has ferreted out some material from dejanews. Some FAQ material has been
adapted from messages posted to  soc.history.medieval, and some information
was provided by William Reitwiesner, Harold Miller and an anonymous source.
 
1.2 Why is there a DSH FAQ?
 
During April 1999 (and in previous months) is was observed that messages
from, or relating to, a single individual were dominating the newsgroup
soc.history.medieval to the detriment of the image presented by the
newsgroup to any new subscriber... at least, I though so. This FAQ was
created to aquaint any new subscribers to the context of discussion
regarding this person.
 
It is not the author's intention to provide new subscribers with any
prefabricated opinion about DSH. New subscribers will have to make up their
own minds whether to ignore, abuse, tolerate or applaud DSH, as they will
with every other poster. It is the  author's intention to expedite and
inform that decision.
 
1.3 Contributing to the DSH FAQ
 
It is the author's intention that the DSH FAQ remains a "living document"
for as long as it is required. To this end submissions of questions and
answers are encouraged. Feel free to submit any factual material you believe
will improve existing answers.
 
Submissions should be made to: dsh_faq@westmore.demon.co.uk
 
1.4 Questions awaiting answers
 
Unsurprisingly, no one has submitted any questions (who really cares that
much?) and so there are no questions awaiting answers.
 
1.5 Copyright information
 
The author specifically disavows any copyright protection on this document.
Please feel free to make any alterations of your choice and repost it as you
please.
 
 
Part 2: Frequently Asked Questions
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
2.1 Who is DSH?
 
DSH is one of the most frequent posters to soc.history.medieval. He lives in
the state of Hawaii and is one David Spencer Hines of Yale's class of 1963;
both of his children have attended Yale. He was formerly listed as one of
the
accounting and business faculty at Hawaii
Pacific University in April 1998. (You may wish to ask him why he is no
longer on the faculty.) He has been described as the laughing-stock of the
US medieval studies community after his expulsion from the MEDIEV-L mailing
list.
 
He was a Commander in the U.S. Navy and is the son of the late Rear Admiral
Wellington T. Hines of Bowling Green, Kentucky. He has a friend named Ken
and eats curries. If you ever get the urge to talk to him, a cursory search
of  Internet sources suggest that he lives at

347, Ilimalia Loop, Kailua, HI 96734; Telephone 808 2543015.
 
He first posted a message to soc.history.medieval in April 1997. Since then
he has been the subject of much derision and the source of much
consternation.
 
2.2 What are DSH's credentials in medieval history?
 
He has none. In this he is much like the majority of contributors to
soc.medieval.history, including myself. Unlike most contributors, DSH raises
the question of credentials.
 
2.3 Why does DSH post to soc.history.medieval?
 
Well, your guess is as good as mine, since he evidences very little
knowledge of (or real interest in) the core subject. He
has posted several messages claiming that his intention is to improve
standards in the group. The interested reader might wish to compare the
state of soc.history.medieval pre- and post-DSH
by using Dejanews.
 
2.4 What characterises the posts of DSH?
 
Firstly, he generally posts meta-topical messages, messages about the group
itself (and its subscribers) rather than the group's actual topic. Secondly,
a misguided attempt to seem learned,
expect a bit of Latin. Thirdly, expect a very and irrelevant signature to
be appended. Furthermore, expect considerably more nouns to be capitalised
than in other people's messages.
 
It is quite usual for DSH to appeal to the authority of "real medieval
historians" (see glossary) over the authority of newsgroup subscribers who
disagree with him. Further discussion generally degenerates into sophistry
about what has been stated, ex-cathedra statements about who is or is not a
"real medieval historian", personal insults and similar insubstantial
commentary.
 
2.5 How should I respond to posts made by DSH?
 
However you like, of course. There are many valid ways of dealing with any
Usenet poster.
 
It would be shameful to attempt to instruct any poster to not respond to a
civil message by any other poster. Please bear in mind that
soc.history.medieval is chartered as a forum to discuss medieval history.
There may be other newsgroups better suited to discussing other topics,
including flame wars and English usage. Continued off-topic posting can be
boring for other subscribers, so please set  your follow-ups accordingly.
 
Many subscribers have been very critical of DSH in the past and it would be
fair to say that few people, if any, have any great respect for his views.
If DSH is attempting to ridicule you personally, you may want to reflect on
this.
 
Several of soc.history.medieval's subscribers have stated publicly that they
intend to ignore DSH, in the most extreme cases they have declared that he
has been killfiled. Some people affect to toy with DSH. If you choose this
path, please respect the convention of
labelling all your posts with the text  "[GARBAGE]" added to the subject
line.
 
2.6 To whom should I complain about DSH?
 
All his messages include a line in the header referring you to
abuse@worldnet.att.net. Before you complain you may want to research what
acceptable use policy Worldnet may have. You might also try contacting
postmaster@aya.yale.edu.

 [I know that the postmaster at AYA.Yale is not interested in enforceing
the TOS of their service. - V-Man]

2.7 Why was DSH barred from the GEN-ROYAL mailing list?
 
Details are (apparently) available at

<http://members.aol.com/reitwiesne/gen-royal/discipline/hines>.
 
2.8 Why was DSH barred from the MEDIEV-L mailing list?
 
He was banned for referring to one subscriber as an alpha-male baboon, and
others as beta baboons. This was, I think, thought to be below the expected
standards of discourse. The original DSH post is available at:

<http://www.ukans.edu/~medieval/melcher/19981201.med/msg00469.html>

From that site it's possible to find the follow-ups which detail the events
leading up to DSH's eventual banishment.
 
2.9 What was the Historiography Challenge?
 
DSH issued a challenge to Laura Blanchard to read his old posts with the
keywords 'Gans' 'ERP' or 'East River Pontificator' in them to learn "an
excellent appreciation for Historiography and the Rules of Evidence,
something you are sorely lacking now."
 
She did so (so can you, details in part 5) and reported her findings in a
message entitled "Historiography on USENET: The D. Spencer Hines Challenge."
When the results of the challenge were posted on the web, DSH wrote to the
president of the University of Pennsylvania to complain about one of its
employees engaging in "character assassination." He threatened legal action
against the University. The pages were withdrawn by Laura despite the
University affirming a commitment to free speech.
 
 
Part 3: Frequently Flogged Horses
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Several subjects are recycled by DSH endlessly and we can expect this to be
the case for the foreseeable future. In no particular order:
 
Paul Gans (and other soc.history.medieval regulars)
 
Expect continued criticism of Paul Gans and other regulars as DSH stalks
themacross the newsgroup (even though many have killfiled him). This is how
DSHis "improving" soc.history.medieval.
 
King Harold and the arrow in "his" eye
 
Paul Gans has opined that the Bayeaux Tapestry does not show Harold getting
one in the eye. Expect DSH to quote differing opinions, as and when he finds
them.
 
Feudalism
 
Expect continued criticism of Paul Gans' dislike for the term.
 
Techniques of education

Since Paul Gans and others are educators by profession, expect continued
outbursts about the state of institutional education in America. It just
ain't like them good ol' days.
 
Baboons
 
DSH was expelled from a mailing-list for describing some people as alpha-
and beta-male baboons. Baboons are in general matriarchal... expect DSH to
remind us that a few aren't.
 
Horse harnesses
 
Expect DSH to remind us that he thinks that Paul Gans' website on Medieval
Technology is fraudulent in its treatment of this subject.
 
The Society for Creative Anachronism.
 
DSH does not respect the SCA. He likened their position to historical
understanding to that of the KKK to race relations.
 
Real Medieval/Military Historians
 
There are some academics that DSH considers to be RMH's, some not. Expect
him to tell us which is which. In particular, Kelly DeVries (a friend of
Paul Gans) is not, apparently.
 
Pedantry
 
The plural of cannon is always cannon, there is only one way to spell
Shakespeare, books set (not sit) on tables... things like that. DSH
criticises people for errors in spelling, grammar and typing, including one
person who was blind and terminally ill (now deceased) and in another case,
a dyslexic.
 
Censorship
 
DSH operates a somewhat perculiar definition of censorship, which seems to
encompass any criticism of himself, although not the criticism that he makes
of other people. See section 2.9 for a revealing insight into DSH's attitude
toward censorship.
 
soc.history.early-modern
 
It was a bad idea, apparently.
 
Medieval espionage
 
He's read a book on it, apparently.
 
President Clinton
 
He is a bad man, apparently.
 
Genealogy
 
DSH likes to post about genealogy, particularly if he can claim to be a
descendent, or if it's about the late Princess of Wales.
 
Jus Primus Nochte
 
Since Paul Gans thinks that the "Right of First Night" as depicted in the
remarkably crass film "Braveheart" is twaddle, expect Hines to occasionally
make out that it might not be. It has been suggested that a bizarre
psycho-sexual connection exists between DSH's obsession with proving his
noble lineage and his illogical adherence to the myth of JPN.
 
Fluency of English kings in the English language
 
Having read an encyclopaedia entry stating that Henry V was the first
English king fluent in English, DSH has been disinclined to accept copious
evidence  that he was not and has frequently varied his definition of
"fluency".
 
Microsoft
 
Microsoft is a perennial target of humour and abuse among computer users,
particularly Unix users. DSH takes a contrary  position as yet another area
in which he may stalk Paul Gans.
 
 
Part 4: Killfiles
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
The matter of "killfiles" or "filters" is a topic that often arises during
discussions about DSH. A killfile is a mechanism by which the news that you
read is expurgated according to criteria of your choice.
 
Many posters have stated that they feel discouraged from posting to
soc.history.medieval because of the risk of being ridiculed by DSH. For
these people pre-emptive killfiling is recommended. So far, nobody has
reported that they have felt that the substance of the newsgroup
has been reduced by killfiling DSH.
 
It is the author's intention to include a summary of how to use killfiles in
various different newsreaders. Since I'm not expert in the use of all
software, I can only report what others see fit to submit, so please send me
details of how your newsreader implements killfiles.
 
Scott Harris writes: (taken from soc.history.medieval)
If you are using Outlook Express as your Usenet reader, it is simple to
block messages from any troll you choose:  select "Tools" and then
"Newsgroup Filters" and then click on the "Add" button.  Type the name of
offensive person in the "From:" box and messages from that person will no
longer be displayed when you access the newsgroup.
 
Mike Lawson writes:
For using a killfile with knews (on a UNIX box):
1) Select a post written by the person to be killfiled
2) Select the "Kill..." button.
3) Under the pulldown button "Header:", select "From" 4) Select the button
"Add new".
5) Select "Close".
 
The rn (and trn) KILL file FAQ by Leanne Phillips is regularly posted to
news.newusers.questions.
 
 
Part 5: Using Dejanews
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Dejanews is a resource available to those who which to search through Usenet
messages that have expired from their server. It goes back several years.
The URL is:
 
http://www.google.groups.com/

 [Note the change - they altered their address a few months ago - V-Man]
 
For best results, select a "power search". You may search their database
for particular keywords and confine your search to particular subjects,
posters, newsgroups and time periods. When entering phrases rather than
words you should enclose them in parentheses.
 
DSH has used two addresses to post to soc.history.medieval,
shines@worldnet.att.net and D._Spencer_Hines_TD@aya.yale.edu
 
To replicate Laura Blanchard's "historiography" search on Dejanews:
 
For keywords: Gans OR ERP OR "East River Pontificator" OR GGGLB
OR "Gans Lickspittle Lackey Brigade"
For newsgroup: soc.history.medieval
For author: shines@worldnet.att.net
For the time period:  Jan 1 1998 through March 31 1998
 
 
Part 6: Glossary
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
6.1 Some commonly used terms
 
FAQ, Frequently Asked Questions
 
An often rhetorical document that serves as an introduction to a subject,
usually phrased in the form of questions and answers.
 
Flamage, flame, flamer, flame war, flame bait
 
Flaming is posting messages intended to insult and provoke. These messages
are flames, the content flamage, the poster a flamer. A flame war is an
exchange of flames, flame bait is a message intended to provoke flames in
response.
 
[GARBAGE]
 
A tag included in the subject line of a message to indicate that you might
not want to bother to read it. Some people have used this tag to indicate
that they have made a strong reply to a message by DSH.
 
Killfile
 
A killfile is a mechanism by which the news that you read is
expurgated according to criteria of your choice. You might, for example
killfile any message where the Subject: line includes
the word "[GARBAGE]".
 
<plonk>
 
The "sound" of someone being dropped into a killfile.
 
Troll, trolling
 
Trolling is posting messages designed to provoke a response of hugely
disproportionate quantity to the original, whether reasoned or flaming.
These messages are trolls, as are the posters. You may see the message
"Please do not   feed the Troll" as an appropriately terse response, or
references to Billy-goats Gruff.
 
6.2 Terms coined by and about DSH
 
A selection of Hines-isms is appended for the interest of those unfamiliar
with his posting style. Although DSH is quite assiduous about elucidating
his acronyms, these have been included in the hope that they shed some light
on his character.
 
BBBB, Bernie Bacharach's Beta Baboons
A group of academics (that includes Beta Baboons Paul Gans) on MEDIEV-L
 
(CR)^2, Creative Repartee and  see entry for "flame" above Creative Ridicule
 
ERP, East River Pontificator
Paul Gans
 
GG, Gotham Groupie
Kathryn Talarico, a person known to Paul Gans... lives in New York
 
GLLB, Gans Lickspittle Lackey Brigade
People who like Paul Gans
 
LOS, Little Old Schlockmeister
Paul Gans

Pit Bull Reboul
Martin Reboul
 
MEP, Massive Elephantine Pratfall
Any perceived inconsistency, esp. of Paul Gans.
 
Milk Dud Warrior  
Anybody commenting on warfare who has no military experience, esp. Paul Gans
 
Mrs. Doubtfire
Laura Blanchard, a person known to Paul Gans
 
Philadelphia Groupie
Laura Blanchard... lives in Philadelphia

Poor Thinker
Paul Gans
 Salome
A fictional younger and sexually carefree Laura Blanchard (!)
 
SD, Stultus Disarmatus
Paul Gans
 
Seven Dwarves  
Postgraduate students who regularly post to SHM

Surrogate Pit Bull
Anybody who regularly disagrees with him, except Paul Gans
 
Taurus the Bull  
Paul Gans
 
WASP, Washington Square Pontificator
Paul Gans
 
In turn, DSH is sometimes referred to as "The Loon", "Toro Fecundian" or as
"Daphne", which he claimed to be his forename.
 
 Appendix: "Sweetie-Pie" versus Substance
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
(start of original message)
 
Subject: "Sweetie-Pie" versus Substance
From: shines@worldnet.att.net
Date: 1997/07/26
Newsgroups: soc.genealogy.medieval;,soc.history.medieval
 
Richard Barney recently made some remarks about what he christened, "sweetie
pie posts and less substantial medieval comments and information."
 
I had not been reading soc.history.medieval until a recent exchange of posts
led me to examine it more closely.
 
If anyone would care to participate in a newsgroup where scholarly standards
are slack to non-existent and there is a great deal of idle chatter about
matters such as --- whether the Carbon-14 tests on the Shroud Of Turin were
forged or not ---- or whether educated Europeans actually believed the world
was flat in 1492 --- when Columbus sailed the ocean blue --- look no
further. You will find it at soc.history.medieval.  It is a virtual
electronic "National Enquirer."
 
Lot's of "I seem to recall... but can't lay my hands on the book now...
because my brother took it off the shelf. ---- "This is from memory, so
don't hold me to it...." "Some time ago I read something about that matter
and here's what remember...." sort of doggerel and gibberish. In short, it
reads like a newgroup on marijuana and crystal meth ---- with a little cheap
red wine thrown in ----- for a chaser.
 
Thank the gods that soc.genealogy.medieval is not so unfocused,
stream-of-consciousness and "Sweetie-Pie" ---- but has some intellectual
rigor and scholarly standards.
--

D. Spencer Hines --- "It is not the critic who counts; not the man who
points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could
have done them better.  The credit belongs to the man who is actually in
the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood;  who strives
valiantly;  who errs and comes short again, because there is no effort
without error and shortcoming;  but who does actually strive to
do the deeds; who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions;  who
spends himself in a worthy cause;  who at the best knows in the end the
triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least
fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold
and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat."

Theodore Roosevelt [1858-1919] Twenty-Sixth President of the United States,
23  April 1910, at the University of Paris (Sorbonne)

(end of original message)

Hilarious

Especially how EVERYONE believes me and not YOU, Hines.

I warned you on numerous occasions that if you ever hit me with a stick, I
would reply with a baseball bat. You chose to ignore that advice so a few of
us on here made it our business to find out all we could about you.

We've done quite well too.

We know your family history better than you, we know all about your father,
even to the point of having a copy of his will. We know about your kids,
your sister, her kids, what they are all doing.

Isn't the internet marvellous ?

A few carefully selected e-mails and the dirt soon came flooding in.

People couldn't wait to spill the beans on you, but their biggest concern
was that everyone in the world was told the truth about you and what an
arsehole you've always been.

Regrets ?

You've never had any regrets in your life, have you Hines ?

You've always been a selfish racist pig who only thinks of himself.

Me ?

No, I've no regrets, I enjoy letting people know you're a failed nobody and
a fraud, who let his family down and ended up a bitter and twisted old man.

In the words of your arsehole of a President;

"Bring 'em on"

MWC

Actually you are a liar. No one of importance takes you seriously.